Is there any greater joy, greater pain, greater stress, greater accomplishment than being a parent? Adoption agencies tell prospective clients all of the hardships that come with parenting but they don’t tell you about the pride you will feel from day one. They don’t tell them how you feel complete just by the presence of your child because they are an extension of you. I don’t want to make this about adoption, though, I want to simply express astonishment that every single day I am surprised when I think I couldn’t feel more angry, more proud, more happy, more stressed by my child and then….. I do. How? How do my emotions and expressions intensify with every day that passes? Is it the higher life stakes that brings me to my knees either in praise or frustration? What makes it all even more interesting is that my child is exactly like me in almost every way. It’s like I’m raising my clone and you would think this would make it easier but it makes it harder. I know the pitfalls but she doesn’t and can’t comprehend them and I think we all know teenagers think they know better. When she needs to be and do better at something, I’m the one that stresses. I want to jump into her body and do what I know needs to be done and knowing that I can’t do that stresses me out! I feel her pain, her happiness, her stress like it is my own. When she was born and was young, I stressed over shaping her character and developing her morals. Righting her wrongs didn’t seem to stress me out too much because I was in control. Once she got into Middle School she developed a level of maturity that shocked me. I have been so lucky in that she makes very mature decisions for herself. Was it the values I instilled in her from birth? I’d like to think so but she has her own personality and likes/dislikes and her own mind so who is to say I made her the way she is? Maybe she was always that way and just grew into it. Now she’s in high school and I’m realizing that things she does now will directly affect her future, and her happiness. She has a lot of responsibility on her shoulders and because she has always been responsible, I give her a lot of space to make decisions and do the right thing without me having to tell her. I’m proud that I can do that. Although I have learned from experience not to underestimate her, she’s still a kid and still learning and I wouldn’t have it any other way. When she was little, I helped her develop character but now that she’s older she has to let her mistakes develop her character. I also have never felt so proud of this young lady, who isn’t perfect, but is learning. I have to be just as proud of the mistakes. The great grandmother in the movie “Parenthood” talked about how she loved roller coasters. She said she had never felt so anxious, happy, scared, excited, sick to her stomach, and thrilled all at once. Isn’t being a parent exactly the same thing? The grandfather in the movie talked about how you don’t stop being a parent when your kids turn 18 years old. He talked about how they are always your kids and the parenting never ends. It’s a never ending roller coaster. I personally hate real roller coasters and will only ride it once! I hate it when I’m on it, then when I get off I think it was pretty fun, but I never get on it again. Maybe that’s why I only had one child! My head, heart, and guts could never do it again, but I wouldn’t trade this experience for anything in the world. When or if someone is trying to tell you only the negative of  having kids, remember that nothing worthwhile is ever easy. Raising a child truly is the greatest accomplishment humans can achieve, whether you gave birth to them or not.